Friday, 23 January 2009
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Losing Faith in Falling.
There are always reasons we are afraid of certain things, we protect ourselves in this way. If we fall off a swingset, we are scared to get back on. If we get bit by a dog, we become afraid of them. Is it the same way with love? If you give yourself to someone 100%, are you too afraid to give yourself to someone else? Has it ruined relationships after that?
My grandma divorced her first husband and then remarried and my mom has been through a divorce and remarried. I am scared of the trend. Growing up, all I saw my parents do was fight...and when I get into a semi-serious relationship and get into an argument I get scared and usually end things soon after the fight.
I know that I want to fall madly in love with the right guy. I also know that in order for that to happen I need to fix this being scared thing. So here are my questions:
Have you ever given yourself whole heartedly to someone and had the rug pulled from under you?
If yes, were you afraid to fall again?
If yes, how did you fix that?
Are your parents divorced?
If yes, are you afraid it's a trend? Possibly a trend you can't stop?
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Comments (5)
I believe this to be a lot of my problem. And i wish i had better advice for you, but i don't.
My mother has been with the same jerk for 13 years and has never been married. I don't think she ever will be (at least as long as she's with him) and I've always been scared that no one would want to marry me. I grew up in the midst of arguments and constant fighting... so I know where you're coming from.
Yes I have given myself whole heartedly to some and had the rug pulled out from under me.
Yes, 2 years later I am afraid to fall again.
Unfortunately I haven't figured out how to fix that quiet yet
Yes my parents are divorced, my mom remarried 4 times and is a single mother at the current moment.
I'm not really afraid that it is a trend. I look at it as some people grow apart. Don't get me wrong at times I wonder if I will be like that but I don't let it sink too deep.
I have been hurt many times by men, and growing up with men in and out of my life I have trust issues with the Male gender.
I think there is hope for all of us. We just have to keep our head up and believe that there is someone out there for us that will break down our walls, who will be with us forever
I have gone in 100% for someone (didn't fall in love or anything) but was committed to making it work and then they throw the 'i'm scared of commitment' phrase. I'm not afraid to fall again cause what if its the right person? I'm not going to let someone screw up things I could have with better guys...the guy was a douche and forever will be a douche. Time fixes things and you realize there are better things out there so don't be afraid of the 'being alone' situation. My parents are still married and how they met was like a fairy tale....met, fell in love and got married - typical....then not so much now so I had a great example to go on but it was too good which caused me to expect a lot which was a downfall but I learned. You will too.